A few months ago, we were having a little trouble with honesty - namely with our 3 year old Jenna. I know she is only 3, and sometimes I do have to pinch myself and remind myself this is so, but we KNOW she is smarter than she acts at times. After reading some inspiring parenting books including "Teaching your children values" by Richard and Lynda Eyre, we decided that we needed to really focus on honesty. So for one month I looked for times when the kids were being honest or telling a lie, and tried to help them understand HOW to be honest, and WHY we should be. We played preschool based games too and created created an HONESTY JAR:
How the jar works:
- Every time Jenna told us the truth and was being honest, she got a lolly to put into her jar. Even if she did something wrong, we still put a lolly in the jar, to let her know that it is a good thing that she told us the truth, even though what she did was wrong.
- If she touches the jar at all, then she will lose ALL of her lollies and will have to start again.
- When the jar was full, we allowed her to eat her lollies.
This activity for us was successful. It did take a while to fill the jar, but we have only needed to use the jar for her once. Learning honesty is still a process, but more often then not, Jenna will tell us the truth. Definitely our response to a situation has affected if she is confident to speak honestly with us. But whatever the situation is, showing an increase in love after it, definitely helps and foster a loving parent-child relationship.
The principle of the "Honesty Jar" can be used in many different situations, depending on the need you have at home. Good luck with this idea in your family :)